Our lawyers wouldn't let us discuss anything related to Gandolf or Lord of the Rings, specifically the allegations that the Investing Wizard is a more powerful sorcerer. So we will not bore you with specifics.
We can't tell you that our Investing Wizard isn't a drawing to represent an AI system we're building to help every investor diversify and learn simultaneously. Nor can we explain how this wizard could work wonders at a party - prompting compliments and praise that will make any evening a success.
We wish we could tell you how the Investing Wizard is a registered investment advisor; but unfortunately we cannot.
All we can attempt to explain is an aura: a magical presence the Investing Wizard attracts to reach superior returns in both the stock market and life.
If you need some magic, look no further.
MATERIAL: 100% COTTON